Help!!!

Why is it so hard to ask for Help? I can’t speak for everyone but I know I have a hard time asking for it. I mean It’s three words for goodness sake. “I need help!” But they are the hardest words to roll of the lips… for me any way. Maybe because it is admitting defeat? Realizing you have failed at something and to ashamed to admit it to anyone else? Probably more to the later one. I recently had to ask for help. I had a difficult time in doing so. In fact it took four weeks to ask. Upon receiving the aide I didn’t feel relief like you are suppose to. The weight was not lifted off my shoulders as expected. It seemed to get heavier. I try not to dwell on it but it just will not go away. In some way I feel ashamed for asking and receiving assistance.

Eeff you Gordon Ramsey!

I really hate to cook. I only do it because I have to. I just try to keep in to small doses. Ironically though I love watching Gordon Ramsay’s “Kitchen Nightmares” on BBC and various other cooking shows on Food Network such as; Chopped, Diners, Drive-ins and Dives. So every time I see an episode of Kitchen Nightmares where Gordon is whipping up a new crusted chicken dish or a cedar grilled salmon steak I think to my self, “Damn, That looks Good! I might have to try That!” And he makes it look So easy. Cooking up beautiful dishes in ten minutes. Then I have to remind myself that it takes me 3 hours to make forty minute potato soup….and its still not quite done then. The only thing I can prepare and cook in ten to fifteen minutes is spaghetti. Which I cook atleast once a week.

Marcus Gras beads!

I have never been to Mardi Gras in person. Don’t think I want to either actually. I did however, take the opportunity to go on a vacation in New Orleans with my two favorite cousins. I’m not real sure about the month. Think maybe it was September 2001? It was still warm I do remember. The three of us drove down in my cousin Lance’s new truck. ( I drove down. ) It was about eight hours of driving. Its dark by the time we arrive and get checked into the hotel. After getting settled in our room. We decide to go out on the town and see what Na’leans has to offer. The three of us agree we want to see Bourbon Street. Great! Plan is made and we execute. Upon entering the lobby we decide to eat at the hotel restaurant and ask the locals (waitress) about sight seeing. Of course she suggests, “You gotta walk down Bourbon Street!” And mentions a few other places as well. As we pay the check she has one last piece of information to share. “Y’all should know that this is Gay Decadence week. Actually it was two weeks ago. After the week long party they all decided to stay a bit longer.” “Oh, Nice!” We reply. However we didn’t just drive eight hours to turn back on account of some people (a few thousand) That like to wear make up and dance. We continue to walk out of the hotel and turn left onto Canal Street heading for Bourbon. It’s around 10:00 11:00 clock by this time. And there are people Every Where! Bourbon street was packed shoulder to shoulder with people and people hanging off balconies. “Might as well be Mardi Gras! Geezus!” I say. So the three of us stay close. As we are walking along I happen to be looking up at all the people on the balconies and the thin angle iron That two hundred years old. Wondering,”How the Hell are they still attached to the building with all that weight?” About that time I see some beads flying at my face. I reach up and catch them with out question. “Hell Yeah! I got some beads and didn’t have to lift anything!” Lance then informs me,”Dude, you just got hit on by a gay guy!” “Really? No! You think so?” “Oh Yeah!” He says. I take a second look and yet again I see beads flying at my face! “Thank You!” I reply. “What I tell ya?” Lance replies. ” Ok, you were right!” I say. “Still, I got beads! That’s what it’s all about!” Continuing on down the street. Misty jumps and turns around suddenly asking, “Which one of y’all touched my ass?” Lance and I look at one another and say, “What? LOL, What are you talking about?” “Y’all , someone touched my ass! I swear!” “Misty, why would Erik or I touch your ass?” Lance says. Looking around she asks, “Well, who else would have done it?” No one else around but gay men and women. “Think it was that chick right there.” Lance says. “OMG!” She replies. We continue walking and not far from Misty’s mysterious gropping we come across this sixty-seventy year old man wearing assless chaps and all leather biker gear. Bent over in the middle of the street with a black guy licking his ass as he laughs. “Woah! Did you just see that guy lick that old dudes ass?” Lance asks. “Yeah, I Did! WOW!” At this point misty is ahead of us an arms length. Looking around all “La dee da!” Oblivious to her surroundings. Yet we continue on a little further. Until Lance and I notice a BIG change in the scenery. A very noticeable change. We look at one another and say, “It’s time to turn around!” “Misty, we need to turn around! Now!” “Why?” She asks. “Look around you Misty! What do you see?” Lance says. “Notice how there are no women around and a large number of men? We say. “Oh, Yeah! You’re right!” So we turned around and headed back yo the hotel. Pausing to look in a few shops selling everything from Mardi Gras masks to BDSM equipment. The following day we are sitting down to lunch looking out the window across the street and to our surprise we see a cintaur walking down the street. Literally a guy wearing furry pants, no shirt and horns. No pan flute that we could tell though. Made us laugh! We spent three days in Na’leans in all. Had a great time for such a short vacation. Definitely got more than we bargained for. Not only did I come home with a few sets of beads. I have this great story to tell.

Late for work! Think I’ll take woodruff rd. It will be faster!

After thirteen years of construction. Charlotte and NC DOT have almost completed the I-485 bypass around the city. I’m sure back then the highway engineers were thinking, “Yeah, four lanes will be enough.” By four lanes I mean two on each side. “Not that many people will be willing to travel thirty miles out of the way to go around Charlotte.” Cause That’s how highway engineers think. I know! I stayed at a Holiday Inn Express once. Fast forward to today and we see the results of all those Not willing to go around. I-485 is more congested than I-85. Making it the most underestimated bypass in my opinion. Its the equivalent of saying, “Oh crap! I’m late for work! Think I will take woodruff road to go around.” If you are familiar with woodruff road at All. You know no one says that. Maybe in the planning stages they estimated for a traffic growth of thirteen years. But then That’s how long the construction has taken. So upon completion it is already to small to handle the volume of traffic. And tell me why, with all the advanced technology we have today, can they not construct a level, smooth interstate? We have lasers and GPS. And satellite guided precision equipment for such things as this. How can they not make the road surface the same grade level as the overpass? Rather than making ski jumps that launch your head to the roof of Your car. I’m convinced that they could not make a level interstate if Jesus came down and operated the machinery. The point is. If you are going to build a bypass around a large city. You should plan for a large volume of traffic to travel it. Plan ahead for crying out loud. Think of the highest number of traffic and triple it. Maybe by the time the project is complete it will be able to handle the volume.

My story and I’m sticking to it!

It was a dark and stormy Friday night in July of 1997. My parents had left to spend the weekend at their get away house in the country. I was to join them Saturday afternoon. I find myself home alone after being out on a date. Its around 11:00 pm. Around 3:00 am in the morning I’m awakened by loud thumping coming from up stairs. My room being in the basement it sounds like a heard of elephants trampling through the house. I listen closely. The sound is all over the house now. My thought is, “Oh No! Someone has broke into the house and is ransacking the place.” “What should I Do?” Go up stairs and confront them? No, could be more than one and I’m out numbered! Call 911? Yes, but not from inside the house. Ok! How to sneak out of the house? The basement is equipped with a sliding door just on the other side of my room. That’s it. That’s my escape! I out on some close and shoes. Getting ready to make a dash for the door. My conscious asks, “Wait! What if you run into one of the burglars? How will you defend yourself?” Good question! So, I take a look around the basement for anything I can use for defense. I come across a wooden dowel about an inch and a half in diameter and about three feet in length. ” Yes, this will Do!” I say to myself. I open the sliding door as sloooow as possible. Cause it does make some and I don’t want to attract attention to my escape. I made it outside undetected. “Now what?” Get to the neighbors house call for backup. The back side of the house has floor to ceiling windows. So I stay low and move quickly. I make it to the corner of the house at the front. I check my six. Nothing. All clear. I look around to the front keeping low to the ground and behind some shrubs. Looks clear. I feel like James Bond at this point. Having made it out of the house unnoticed and around the corner to the front. Only difference is I haven’t had to kill anyone. I make a mad dash, approximately fifty yards, to the neighbors house. I check my six. Clear. I approach the front door and knock. My neighbor answers half asleep. “I think someone has broke into my house. Can I use your phone to call 911?” “Yeah, sure!” He says. Operator, “911 what’s your emergency?” ” I think someone broke into my house.” “Ok, are they still in the house?” ” Yes, I think So!” “Are you in a safe place?” “Yes, I’m at my neighbors next door.” ” What’s your address?” “306 saluda Dr. Piedmont.” ” I’m sending Anderson county to check it out. Stay by the phone and I will call you back when they have it cleared.” ” Ok!” Thirty minutes later the phone rings. “Hello!” ” Mr. Roberts?” Yes, this is he!” ” The officers are on scene and request your presence.” “Oh ok! Thank you!” “Your welcome!” Thank you for calling 911 and have a safe day!” I return to the house. This time the sun is beginning to rise. As I approach the front door I see two Anderson county deputies on the porch talking to my sister. ” Mr. Roberts do you know this person?” “Yes, That’s my sister!” ” Erik, what are doing? And why do you have a piece of wood?” She says. “I thought someone broke into the house so I called the police.” “Where were you?” She asks. “I was next door at the neighbors house.” The officers ask, “So everything is ok here?” ” Yes sir! Thank you!” I say. ” No problem! Y’all have a nice day!” I was unaware my sister would be coming home that night. Much less have friends come with her. Even though my assumption was a little on the “over reaction” side of things. I was right that someone came into the house. That is the only time I have ever dialed 911. I felt like an idiot for a few days afterwards though. And it makes for a Great story now.

Is America still Great?

America was founded on individual liberty and endless opportunity. Built on the believe that anyone can rise from poverty and become wealthy.
Men like John D. Rockefeller, who was dirt poor growing. Borrowed money to buy his first oil well. Eventually building the largest oil company in the country.
Pioneered the oil pipeline and gave rise to the automobile with the by product of gasoline. Becoming the richest man in history.
Andrew Carnegie came to this country as a poor Irish immigrant looking for an opportunity. He starts a small business called U.S. Steel and quickly builds an empire during the industrial revolution. Making him the second richest man in the world.
Cornelius Vanderbilt borrowed a $100 from his mother to buy a small periauger ( a shallow draft two masted sailing vessel ) and began a shipping company. Later he would sell his fleet of steamboats to invest in railroads.
These men, and countless others I don’t have space to mention embodied the “American spirit”. They lived and became the dream. Where is this kind of spirit? Does it still exist? What these men accomplished seems to be an impossible task in the America of today. Why is that? Do men like these not live here anymore? Is the “Dream” dead? Maybe everything worthy of these accomplishments has been done.

I get face palmed….a Lot!

I have this inate talent to reference music lyrics at random.
For example, a friend of mine posted a quote on Facebook that had the line, “…free your mind…” in it. So, I commented with, “Free your m-i-n-n-d and the rest will follow!” From En Vogue. When Amanda and I were picking out colors for our house. The realtor says, “You can go with the red shutters.”. We asked, “Well what color will the front door be?”
She replied,” We match the door with the color of the shutters so it would be red.”
I said, “No, we can’t have that! When I see a red door I want to paint it black!”
Yep, face palmed!
When I get asked for my phone number at Sears. I say, “867- 5309ee-ine!”
Yep, face palmed! And a dirty look by the cashier.
It has been over thirteen years that I first started popping my fingers. Initially it began as a simple bend of my wrist quickly followed by a flip and downward press of my thumb that pops my index finger. Has now evolved into an elaborate display of, “How can I make this more elaborate?”
So I experiment with small choreographed scenarios. I might be walking along she all of a sudden I leap up like a ballerina and land with a twist and, “crack”!
Yep, face palmed!
Currently I’m trying to choreograph drawing back a bow and releasing an arrow. Its a little more difficult than you would think.

Fact or Fiction?

In light of recent events in the sports world such as Lance Armstrong’s confession of doping and Manti Teo’s fictional girlfriend. The alleged staging of the Sandy Hook shooting. It seems everything in the world today is a lie.
The web of deceit is now being unraveled about Lance Armstrong’s elaborate cover up of his doping scandal. Several other cyclist have now come forward to admit to seeing him dope. They say Lance threatened them with legal action if anything was said. This went on for 2 decades. If all the allegations coming to light are true Armstrong is the biggest bully of sports.
Yesterday we learn that famed Notre Dame line backer, Manti Teo, lied about dating a girl he never met and her dieing of leukemia.
He claims to be a victim of a “catfish” style scam. Catfish scam being a reality show about hoaxes.
The sports media believe he knew about the hoax and was involved in some way of planning the whole thing to get the sympathy vote for the Heisman trophy. Others claim he is the victim of a great “Punked” prank set up by his best friend that lasted over a year.
Maybe he master minded the entire plan to cover up the fact he is gay so he could be drafted in the NFL without confrontation of his sexuality.
There is a growing number of people that believe the entire Sandy Hook shootings were a hoax to implement stricter gun control laws. Eventually leading up to confiscation of all fire arms. Several videos have surfaced on YouTube to outline and support these allegations.
Who is to blame here? The athletes that take extreme measures to succeed in their sport? Or the society that glorifies their achievements? The extreme political fundamentalists that want to push their agenda to rid the citizens of “the right to bear arms” in order to lead the country to a totalitarian government?
So much of what we see day to day is fiction. Next we will learn the Holocaust never happened. Oswald was not the one that shot J.F.K. And we never landed on the moon.

Leading the “Rat Race”

A few years ago I read a book called, Rich Dad Poor Dad by Robert kiosaki. He explains how society is sucked into a “rat race” where the average person is persuaded to buy and spend money on material items they really Don’t need. And this keeps them running around in a circle of the more money they earn the more they want to spend.
Through out the book he explains how to combat this by teaching the difference between an “asset” and a “liability”.
The point I’m trying to make here is I feel like I’m leading the “rat race”. No matter how many liabilities I cut from my budget. I find myself still going around the track unable to break free.
Some times I even feel like the only one on the track as, I look around and observe others moving along without worry. Wondering to myself, “How do they afford that? Where Do they work? What am I doing wrong?”
So I remain in my circle track always looking for my escape. Struggling to make ends meet and put food on the table. Checking my rearview for anyone else on my six.

Class warfare

Class warfare has been around since the age of money. In ancient times you have the wealth of kings and nobles and then you have the peasants. There was no such thing as the middle class. While the peasants struggle to provide for themselves the aristocrats want for nothing. Today we see the same scenario with the tax hike on the rich because the poor feel slighted. They have been convinced the rich became rich by cheating.
Yes, I myself am jealous and envious of rich/wealthy people. But does that give me the right to take from them? To impose higher taxes on them? Run a smear campaign for them being successful? Is that not the american dream? To overcome strife and poverty and not worry of oppression?
Selling the idea of a tax increase on wealthy citizens only hurts the people that agree with that ideology. The rich did not become rich by being stupid with money.